


Dread in My Heart

by Demenior



Category: Animorphs - Katherine A. Applegate
Genre: F/M, Post-Canon, after the war, it's not a happy story, pseudo-science based on morphing technology, warnings inside due to spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-03
Updated: 2013-08-03
Packaged: 2017-12-22 07:09:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,656
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/910363
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Demenior/pseuds/Demenior
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cassie followed the sound of the radio and found Jake in the nursery. She paused in the doorway to watch him stretch to paint the upper parts of the walls, and how the muscles down his back showed nicely through his sweat-soaked shirt.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dread in My Heart

**Author's Note:**

> See bottom for all warnings (spoilers in the warnings)  
> note- potentially triggering things around what can go wrong during a pregnancy. 
> 
> ((based on personal headcanons about how the morphing technology would influence their lives had the ending been slightly different))

Cassie followed the sound of the radio and found Jake in the nursery. She paused in the doorway to watch him stretch to paint the upper parts of the walls, and how the muscles down his back showed nicely through his sweat-soaked shirt.

“I’m heading out,” she said.

Jake turned around, lighting up the moment he saw her. He set the roller down and walked over for a kiss.

“Don’t touch me,” she laughed, “you’ve got paint _everywhere_.”

He wiped his hands on his shirt, but it didn’t do much good.

“Sorry,” he said.

She tucked a finger under his chin to guide him in for a quick kiss, “I’ll be home in a few hours.”

“You sure you don’t want me to come?” he asked.

Cassie smiled, “I’ll be fine. We’re not even doing any ultrasounds this time, so there’s nothing to see,” she touched her stomach and both she and Jake grinned, “I’ll be back before you know it.”

“I’ll start dinner once I’m done with this coat,” Jake said.

Cassie rolled her eyes, “That’s wonderful, but you don’t have to treat me like I’m made of glass. I can cook a meal.”

“I know,” Jake said, “I just love you.”

They kissed again and while Jake still wasn’t holding onto her Cassie had her fingers in his hair and one hand cupped around his jaw. She pulled back breathing harder than she should be, “I’m going to go before I’m late.”

  

Cassie had been seeing Dr. Vera Juarez since getting the good news that she was pregnant. The woman was smart, practical, willing to keep hush on any details about the baby of The Animorphs and had a wicked sense of humor.

Cassie drove herself, though Jake was asking that either he drive or they get a personal driver for her, and had to park in the back to try and avoid reporters. She still wore sunglasses and one of Jake’s sweaters with a deep hood as she made her way from the car to indoors, just in case.

If she’d been able to morph she would have just flown in through an open window. She’d discovered why morphing while pregnant wasn’t an option the hard way two years ago. This time she was going to get everything right.

Dr. Juarez was waiting by the elevator for her, and didn’t say a word until they were inside so that they didn’t draw any attention.

“How are you feeling?” she asked.

Cassie pulled her disguise off, “Much better _now_.”

They left the elevator and headed into her office, “Can I get you a glass of water?”

Cassie shook her head, “No thanks, I’d like to be in and out as quickly as possible, no offense.”

Dr. Juarez directed her to sit on the couch instead of at the desk.

“Cassie I don’t think I have good news for you,” she said.

Cassie’s stomach plummeted, “What’s wrong?”

“So far the baby is healthy,” Vera said quickly, “but I was taking a closer look at the ultrasounds we did last time and I believe there are some deformations.”

“How?” Cassie asked, even though she didn’t want to know the answer. Was she at fault?

“When we did a screening to check you and Jake for any potential genetic diseases, you both came up relatively clean. But if you recall I have an interest in veterinary sciences—”

It was one of the reasons Cassie liked her so much, “And what?”

“It seems the baby may be developing in some areas like an animal. It’s difficult to see at this stage, but the legs don’t appear entirely human. And it may have a tail.”

Cassie felt sick, and numb with shock, “The morphing?”

Vera nodded, and held Cassie’s hand between hers, “Right now I don’t know how this is going to affect the baby. I don’t know how morphing influences children.  We’re going to increase our visits and monitor the baby closely until we have a better understanding.”

Cassie didn’t realize she was shaking until Vera squeezed her hand tighter.

“Is… is my baby going to live?” Cassie whispered.

“Right now it is still growing healthy,” Vera said, “but I’m going to have to ask you and Jake to give us both blood samples so that we can determine the array of animals we may be dealing with. Jake especially.”

 “Okay,” Cassie nodded, and her voice broke. Vera quickly handed her a box of tissues.

“Does this… does this mean _any_ child we have will be…” she couldn’t finish. She didn’t know what to say.

Vera shook her head, “No—I think _you_ can have healthy, human children. I have a basic understanding of the morphing technology at best, but what I know is that it somehow integrates the animal DNA into your own—why you can’t give blood and your DNA tests are very difficult. All females are born with a set number of eggs, so the DNA is human from the start and even after the morphing is acquired I don’t think it would be integrated into the eggs. As for men, they are constantly cycling sperm. I think that it’s more likely Jake is the one who passed on his own animal DNA.”

“I need to call Jake,” Cassie said quietly, “he… he needs to be here.”

“I thought he would have come with you, unless he was out of town,” Vera said, “I can make the call for you?”

Cassie nodded, “May… may I use the other room?”

“Cassie I am so sorry,” Vera said softly, “let me know if I can get you anything.”

“Don’t…” Cassie struggled to control her breathing, “just don’t let him know it might be his fault.”

 

Jake arrived in a flurry of feathers through Dr. Juarez’s window. He was still demorphing when he grabbed Cassie and wrapped his arms around her. She sobbed into his shoulder while Vera went through what she’d told Cassie.

While Cassie was outwardly emotional, and struggling to contain herself, Jake went cold and quiet the worse he felt.

“What’s the danger to Cassie,” he finally asked.

“As of right now the fetus is normal sized, though the non-human parts do appear to be developing faster. We’ll try and determine which animal DNA it may have inherited so we can determine the different development rates.”

“Can it even survive outside of the womb?” Cassie pressed.

Vera shook her head, “It’s far too early to tell. Right now, no. No fetus would survive if we were to remove it.”

Both Cassie and Jake flinched. Dr. Juarez folded her hands across her lap,

“I am only proposing this as an option, not suggesting it or enforcing it. But you may want to consider aborting this pregnancy.”

“No,” Cassie said immediately.

Vera nodded, “It’s entirely your choice. But we don’t know how human this child will be, and we don’t know how well it may function. It could be rendered completely invalid by the animal parts, with a fully functioning human mind. Or it may be a mix of several animals and human, with only an animal’s mind. I bring up abortion only for you to think about, for yours and the child’s future.”

“We’ll think on it,” Jake said.

“No,” Cassie said again, to Jake more than anyone. Jake squeezed her arm in response.

“For now I’m going to get blood samples from both of you, and I want to see you weekly from now on, Cassie,” Dr. Juarez said.

 

Jake wanted her to abort the baby. He was scared it was going to hurt her. Cassie couldn’t bring herself to end a life that _they_ had created. They fought for hours over it—the longest fight they’d ever had. Jake stopped working on the nursery, Cassie stopped sleeping soundly. if Rachel had been alive still she would have been able to talk sense into Jake. She also would have been the extra support Cassie needed.

Jake went to every appointment with her and still wrapped himself around her at night.

The baby developed as well as could be expected. It had a predominant mix of tiger, anole and wolf DNA. Vera told Cassie in confidence that all of the animal DNA present in the baby came from Jake. Cassie couldn’t bring herself to tell him.

Dr. Juarez eventually sat them down and said that they animals would develop faster than a human, and it’s lungs were going to be fully formed very quickly. It was still too early for a human, but if they didn’t remove it the baby was going to drown.

 

After the surgery the baby had to be rushed to neo natal, and Cassie hadn’t had the chance to get a good look at it. Even covered in her blood, she could make out a vaguely human shape with patches of thick fur, stripes and skin. The coiled tail popped off in the nurses hand. It might have had four limbs. She wasn’t sure.

 

When she woke up, Tobias was perched on a char beside her. He morphed human as her eyes blinked open, and held her hand between his own.

“Welcome back,” he said, “how are you feeling?”

“The baby?” Cassie asked.

Tobias’ face fell, “Jake and Marco are waiting for news. I can go get him.”

Cassie squeezed Tobias’ hand, “No, not yet.”

Tears blurred her vision and she choked back a sob. Tobias was running his hands through her hair and making comforting sounds. She managed to get an arm around him and he held her while she cried. She wished Rachel was there.

 

By the time she’d morphed and demorphed to heal the incisions, she was feeling more in control of herself. Tobias had reset his clock and waited while she got dressed to take her to Jake.

 

Jake met her in the doorway to her room. The look on his face was all she needed to know.

**Author's Note:**

> Warnings for: talk of abortion, mentions of miscarriages, c-sections, ambiguous endings that may imply the death of a newborn, language when talking about the deformation in the baby my be insulting/hurtful to people (I really don't mean it to be and tried to be clear that Cassie only cares if the baby lives or dies) and also bad attempts at baby science.


End file.
